Twentyfour reasons Chairmen Meow hates Alexander
by thatcrazygirl13
Summary: Title says it all. Malec.


A quick fic to kill writer's block. I don't own the MI series.

Twenty four reasons Chairman Meow hates Alexander Lightwood

1. The second, his person, Magnus laid eyes on that boy, he completely forgot whose birthday he'd invited all these (loud crazy, weird-smelling) creatures that crowded Chairman Meow's flat.

2. He never watches were he puts his feet. The first night that boy sleeps over, he stumble into the kitchen to get a drink, and promptly steps on him. Chairman Meow was not happy.

3. His feet are where Chairman Meow sleeps. Right there, on the foot of his person's bed. Why is that boy's foot there! That night Chairman sleeps on the couch.

to the 25% of pet owners who let their pets be in the same room while having sex, Chairman is out on the couch for the tenth time this month. He is not pleased.

5. That boy doesn't like him. He knows it. And that boy knows that he knows that the boy knows that he knows that the boy knows that he knows that the boy knows that he knows.

6. He smells of another cat.

7. The boy's sister constantly over now and seems to like nothing else expect talking to his person, dragging his person out of the flat, and trying to pet Chairman Meow.

8. The boy's not as bad as the fairy or the warlock that loved to turn him orange but he's defiantly not good. The difference is they liked him; this one doesn't

9. The boy is convinced Magnus should get rid of him. Or at least buy him a cat bed and make him sleep there.

10. They have taken the couch and have started pressing their lips together. Chairman Meow finds this disgusting.

11. When his person let's that boy stay in his apartment, alone for the weekend. It's worse when Magnus goes off on an emergency, leaving that boy and Chairman alone. The entire time Chairman is fed dry cat food, instead of his usual fresh cod. He truly loathes that boy.

12. That boy convinces his person to leave. For two weeks Chairman is fed dry cat food by that boy's sister.

13. The boy's sister decided to bring over her own cat. At first they hiss and paw at each other but by the end of the day, Chairman learns how lucky he is to only have to put up with the boy, and not the bloodsucker, his person and the little redhead.

14. Suddenly the atmospheres changed. It started when that female that didn't feel right and had fangs that match his came in and explored his flat. Now both his person and that boy are tense. It's been like this ever since his person and that boy returned from the trip.

15. They now feel the need to yell at each other in the middle of the night and effectively depriving Chairman of sleep. That boy storms out, slamming the door, leaving his person angry. Chairman regains his spot on the foot of the bed.

16. He loses his spot the day that boy comes back. He is extremely disappointed to the say the least.

17. The moment his person gets the new that silly boy is injured he's off. Leaving Chairman Meow behind, in the dust.

18. It's rare that his person leaves out his potions. But it's still that boy's fault. His arm is in a cast and its awkward and bulky. The stupid boy accidently knocks on of the potions off of the counter and suddenly it's falling and landing all over Chairman Meow. Suddenly he feels amazing! Perfect!

19. Suddenly Magnus is there and he's frantic. He explains to the boy that the potion was meant for the boy. It had made the boy's cat immortal and he'd tweaked it to be for the boy.

20. They have a plan to remake the potion and give it to the boy, but before they can the boy is dragged off on some mission to stop someone by the name of Jonathan. Two weeks later a message comes saying the boy is dead. After Magnus finishes reading the letter, sits down and water starts leaking from his eyes. Chairman is sure something is wrong. His person never slept on the couch before.

21. The boy comes back a week later. It seems that it was all a miscommunication, a ploy the man he was hunting had done to throw everyone off. Chairman is forgotten in his person's joy.

22. His person successfully performs the spell. Now Chairman is stuck with the boy forever.

23. One day, five years after his person laid eyes on him, the boy comes in with a gold ring studded with tiny diamonds on his finger. Chairmen wonders how mad his person would be if he scratched the boy's face, leaving scars.

24. Then there's a flurry of activity and one day his person puts on a suit and disappears for a month.

25. When they return home both are deeply tanned, and Chairmen is shocked when the boy suggests getting a bigger bed.

He has regained his spot on the foot of the bed. And as he's falling asleep he realizes he might not hate his boy after all.


End file.
